“It” being me not going to uni.

It’s very little to do with willpower or forcing myself to stay in bed and all to do with the fact that they’re rehearsing scenes they don’t need me for today. Once upon a time, I may have been disappointed, but today I am going to stay in bed, make my Christmas list seeing as my mum keeps asking, eat Celebrations (I’ve not had chocolate for ages, there’s only so much fruit a girl can take) and not think about being a man-eating plant. How great does that sound?

Although I do have one slight fear – that I’ll feel guilty and go to uni even though I don’t have to be there, and there really isn’t any point in me being there. My emotions are so up and down lately, I feel like anything could happen.

I still can’t believe it’s less than three weeks until we get to see the baby again. I’m 18 weeks and one day pregnant, and my baby is the size of a sweet potato (as I told you the other day). A sweet potato is freaking massive. I think the scary thing is that it’s only going to get bigger. I’m fine with it being in there now, but… well, it’s got to come out at some point. That’s the bit I’m not altogether too crazy about.

Nearly had a little cry last night, but held it in. D was in the shower and I was looking at toiletries (not as in just watching our toiletry shelf, I mean online in the catalogues) and felt quite emotional really – all because we don’t have a bath. Sanctuary does amazing Mum To Be toiletries, but they’re all for baths. I hate the bath at home, and we don’t have a bath in the student house, which is why I’m hoping that if we manage to find somewhere to live, it’ll have a bath. But right now, we don’t. Which made me quite upset.

Pregnancy is weird. I’m weird.

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